In the sanctuary of education, you don’t have to be a prisoner:
Recalling
defining moments of our visit to the Prison University Project at San Quentin State Prison
“There
is a resilience of human spirit that even a small number of those men and women
in hell of the prison system survive it and hold on to their humanity. “ –Howard
Zinn
There are many of us who have seen stories of San
Quentin prison depicted on “reality” television shows whose claim to fame is to
bring outsiders a “truthful” look inside a notorious institution. An institutional
juggernaut of violence, addiction and gangs.
My goal here is to not discount everything that is
depicted. There is some truth to the conditions of prison life. It is not a
place to be or to call home. Prison is
painful, exclusionary and sad.
Try to imagine it.
The lack of human affection; of love. The absence of the warmth of your lover’s
body wrapped around you at night, the inability to hold your child…these are
all lost human connections. Sometimes replaced with actions of violence,
against oneself and others; feelings of vulnerability, shame, fear and anxiety
to conceal the maddening loss of autonomy, respect and loving connections that
compose our humanity.
There are gangs.
There is
violence.
There is addiction.
There is
mental illness.
There is
death.
There is despair.
There is
sadness.
There is
remorse.
There is
guilt.
There is
shame.
And there is regret.
There is also something else.
Hope. Courage. Determination. Strength. Resilience.
This is the story within the walls of San Quentin I
want to tell.
That despite its conditions and limitations the
inmates in general population at San Quentin find themselves in, there is an unyielding
journey of repair, self-discovery and determination to not let mistakes define
who they are.
Our visit to San Quentin Prison was to see
first-hand the structure, dynamics and interpersonal relationships that occur and
develop within the Prison University Project (PUP). We were nothing short of blown away.
Jody Lewen, Executive Director of the Prison
University Project, met us at the gate before escorting us through the prison
clearance routine. Meeting Jody was like reuniting with a long lost friend. I had
corresponded with Jody through several emails and telephone conversations prior
to our visit out to the West Coast. Jody wanted to ensure we were all aware of
the rules and dress codes at the prison but also extended kind gestures of
transportation, food and networking. She was even more warm and welcoming in
person than she was over the phone. After exchanging hugs, Jody thanked us for
visiting and thanked us for our pursuits advocating for education within
prisons.
Truly a warm welcoming especially compared to the
intimidating infrastructure of historical Spanish architecture that now housed
thousands of California citizens under state correctional supervision, towering
in the background.
Several guards dressed in dark-green military style
uniforms met us at three different identification check points and security
scan before we could even actually enter the prison. Not to mention slamming
prison gates that mimicked infamous Californian earthquakes.
Despite the warmth and kindness of Jody, all the intimidating
factors started weighing in.
How does one truly prepare their psyche to encounter
what is a reality to so many but so far removed from outside society?
After all, this was the notorious San Quentin
Prison! I think I can speak for myself and my colleagues, that walking through
the corridor of the prison, down the descending pathway and around the corner
of the long prison wall we were expecting to see a scene of "thugs" ballin' it up in the
yard, lifting weights and pockets of racially segregated groups.
We
approached the yard and nothing could have been further from the truth.
What
we did see was amazing and a powerful testament to the value of the Prison
University Project. We saw men lining the outside walls of the educational
trailers.
Armed
with books.
Books in white mesh book bags thrown over
their shoulders. We saw a table set up to encourage other inmates to
participate in a democratic dialogue of concerns and community building within
their walls. We saw staff writers and editors passing out the current edition
of the San Quentin news; one of the only newspapers in California, possibly in
the nation written entirely by inmates.
We
saw men approach Jody, bid her good evening and strike up conversation as if
they had been friends for a lifetime.
Their
attitudes were contagious. At every corner, there were not rival gangs
defending their yard territory, there were men engaging in conversation and
debate about what social psychology theory best applied to the anticipated
night’s lesson, men sitting independently proofreading papers to turn in for
class, men reviewing notes from the last class.
During
the several days we visited San Quentin, we had the opportunity to sit in on
higher education classes all taught by professors and graduate students from
Stanford and UC Berkley, some of them driving over an hour to and from to teach….voluntarily.
The dialogue was challenging and
thought-provoking. The PUP students were held to the same academic parity as
fellow graduate students from Stanford or Berkley.
During
a break in one of the seminar classes I had the privilege to speak with a PUP
student, Kenyatta (what I didn’t know at the time was that Kenyatta was the valedictorian
of his graduating class for his Associates Degree). He inquired about our visit
and relayed to us that the PUP was literally a lifeline for him. He said that “education was the most worth
having possession he could have.”
In
our time we also had the opportunity to attend the preparatory reading, writing
and math classes. I have sat for weeks trying to find the right words to
express how sitting in those classes watching grown and sometimes frail, old
men struggle to read or do simple multiplication made me feel.
Is
there a word for sadness so deep it burns a picture into your being? I will
never forget those men. Struggling but remaining hopeful. Frustrated yet
persistent.
Each
time we left the facility during our visit there was an array of emotions to
sort through. Whether we travelled back into the city by car, train, cab or
ferry our conversations were filled with reflections about the classes and
social dynamics within the program that trickled out into general population.
Documenting
mentally and on paper the stories behind the Prison University Project has
helped me further advocate for the benefits of educational programs in prison.
Furthermore, our visit has empowered me with greater knowledge and a deeper
understanding of the dire importance to aid in the deconstruction of social
misconceptions of those incarcerated. Misconceptions generate a fear; creating
an unhealthy divisionary reaction of seclusion from one another and our
communities; placing members of our society into categories of us and them; the
worthy and the un.
I want to make
clear, prison is no playground and there is definitely a need for reform. It is
sad and painful. There is little rehabilitation and in some pockets, breeding grounds
for further criminalization. But understand this; there are more people than
not who are holding on to hope and doing the very best they can in their
circumstance to change the course of their lives. There are men incarcerated at
San Quentin who do community fundraiser to help at risk children, they organize
walks, runs and prison baseball games to raise money for fellow inmates with
cancer. They are not all bad people; some have just made mistakes (or been in
the crossfire of bad law and policy). They are human beings who work against
our societal grains of letting their mistakes define who they are. It is
ridiculous and sad that these stories
are not what we see in the news and media.
I am
thankful to Jody for all of her inspiring work and relentless dedication towards
stimulating public awareness and meaningful dialogue about higher education and
criminal justice. The Prison University Project at San Quentin is one of the
guiding models the Guilford College Higher Education in Prison Initiative hopes
to learn from.
